View from the North 40: The judge said hippo-what-amus?

Ladies and gentlemen, please give a warm round of applause as we officially welcome into the human species, and perhaps an election near you, the 80-some hippopotamuses affectionately known as the “cocaine hippos,” and if you are confused, just wait until the end, where I make none of this clear.

For those who haven’t heard or read in the news about these hippos and their legal case, the recap of the situation is that in the 1980s four hippos were illegally imported to Colombia by Pablo Escobar. Yes, that Pablo Escobar, the King of Cocaine who set the gold standard for drug cartels in the ’80s...