The beautiful poetry of SPAM

It's probably too obvious to be worth mentioning, since I do write for part of my living, but I love words.

The thing is that it's not just the words themselves — like how "unite" and "untie" have the same letters but the opposite meaning (what are the odds?). Or how one letter can have all the meaning in the world — compare public health to pubic health. Or the grammar of how your panda "eats shots and leaves" or it "eats, shoots, and leaves."

It's also the visual possibilities of words. Think about the phrase "I will always be behind you" written in beautiful, blue, flowing script letters with flowers in the background, like a card from your mom. Now write it in ragged, deep red letters with a suspiciously dripping knife in the background. That right there spells scary stalker of death. Move. Don't leave a forwarding address.

Sometimes, though, all you need is the right line breaks and, as a plus, sketchy English-as-a-second-language writing skills. I received an average SPAM letter in my email and made this awesome poetry out of it different with line breaks:

Hello guy!

My name is Olesya. I hope

my letter will find you in good mood.

I have decided to write to you and

maybe you will answer.

Once upon a time,

the loneliness has come into my home

and since then does not want to

let me off.

The loneliness establishes own

laws of life

and life filles with sadness

and disappointment.

I freeze from loneliness.

Every evening I look

at a sundown

and I try to absorb all warmth of day, up to last drop.

I am looking for a partner in life

to share

simple pleasures

and together

take off

from the soul the weariness and

sadness

given birth by loneliness.

I am

looking for a man to become friends

first of all

and to go

together along the road of life,

to have common joy,

together enjoy autumn magnificence,

together build the future.

I do not know

if

it is really possible to find it in such a way.

But I know that

many people not been able to find

happiness in the usual life,

have found happiness

in this way. I am happy where I now,

and my life is a good life,

but happiness has no sense

if you cannot share it with person

dear to you.

I could not find here

a man who will make me blossom

like flower.

That is why I took this courageous

for me

step.

As speak, the journey of a thousand miles begins

with a

single

step.

To tell about itself briefly

is impossibly, therefore

I will not try to do it now.

I will wait for your letter

and if you are really serious in your search,

maybe we will find interest in

each other.

Please reply.

——

I am baited with breath waiting at [email protected].