No Quit

She knew it the second it happened. How? Because she’d been there before.

The second that she felt that pain in her knee, Montana State University-Northern senior Rachelle Bennett not only knew what had just happened, but she knew exactly what lay ahead.

That’s because, when Bennett tore ligaments in her knee in the final seconds of a Jan. 8 game against Carroll College inside the Armory Gymnasium, it wasn’t the first time. Unfortunately, Bennett had been there, done that.

The first time came in March of her junior year, as the Skylights were trying to upset eventual NAIA national champion Oklahoma City in the second round of the 2014 NAIA national tournament. Bennett, who was having a breakout game for the Skylights that afternoon, and had become an ever-increasingly important player over her first three years at MSU-N, tore her knee up, and what followed was nine months of intense rehab, of watching an entire season of her team play without her while she was on the bench in street clothes, and of course, questions, concern and sometimes doubt.

So, on that night against the Fighting Saints, after all she’d been through to get back on the floor, Bennett, who hails from Joilet, Montana, saw her basketball career flash before her very eyes, for the second time.

“I knew it right when it happened,” Bennett, who was averaging 10 points per game when the knee injury against Carroll occurred. “I knew I did something to the same knee again. It hurt, but I think I was more disappointed than I was in actual pain.”

“It’s just brutal,” Northern head coach Chris Mouat said. “To see all she went through after the first one, when she was having one of her best games of her career, at the national tournament, and then to have it happen again, on our floor, it just makes you sick to your stomach. Rachelle’s commitment to our program, on and off the floor has been second to none. So it was just heartbreaking.”

Heartbreaking for Bennett, too. She had just gone nine months without being in uniform. She sat out the entire 2014-15 season, a season in which the Skylights posted 30-plus wins, came within a point of a Frontier Conference championship and reached the NAIA Elite 8, even though she was officially cleared to play in December of that year.

But because of what Bennett went through after her first setback, even in that split second when it looked like her career might be over for good last month, and because of who Bennett is, she knew she wasn’t going to just walk away, even after being helped off the floor that night against Carroll.

“I just can’t quit,” she said. “I knew right away I was going to try and play again. I didn’t tell anybody that until later, but I just thought, pretty much right away, that I have to at least try. My family and my doctors wanted me to be done, but I just think it’s worth a try. I want to be able to leave knowing I gave everything I possibly could. If I don’t at least try, I would have always wondered about it. So deep down, I knew right away that I was going to try and come back.”

So, even after two devastating knee injuries, even after all the pain and suffering, and after a year without a ball truly in her hands, Bennett is fighting back. Just as she did a year ago.

A not so lost season

When Bennett injured her knee the first time, the season was over for the Skylights, who lost a narrow game against Oklahoma City. But Bennett’s future was still clouded. Surgery came that April, followed by intense rehab — and an even more difficult decision.

Knowing she’d be physically able to play halfway through last season, Bennett had to make a choice: miss half the season of what would be her last, or red-shirt and come back and play a full year in 2015-16. And while she ended up sitting out the year, the final decision didn’t come until her nationally ranked Skylights were already on a roll, and about to embark on conference play.

“It wasn’t until Christmas break that I made that decision last year,” Bennett said. “I was cleared to play, but I thought the best thing to do was to continue to focus on my rehab, and get as strong as I could. Looking back now, I’m glad that’s the decision I made. I think it was the best thing for everybody, myself and the team.

“That was tough,” Mouat added of Bennett’s decision to forgo the entire year, a year that would go on to be one of the most memorable in Skylights’ history. “But I went to her right away and told her, I need you as a coach. Rachelle knows our system better than anybody. She’s inspirational, and she’s a leader. So there were many nights when I turned to her as a coach. She commands respect from our team, and she was a huge help in the run we made last year.”

Being relegated to the role of essentially an assistant coach, and a team leader wasn’t easy. But it also helped her grow, as a player, as a possible future coach and as a person, too.

“There were nights where it was very difficult,” Bennett said. “As an athlete, you always want to be out there playing with your teammates, instead of sitting there on the bench, so it was hard. It wasn’t the path I thought I would take, but looking back, it was the best decision for me. But it was hard, every night, I just wanted to be out there playing.”

Once the decision was made, though, Bennett couldn’t go back. However, as has been the case her entire year, she chose to turn her situation into a positive, and because of her missed season, instead of a lost season, it became a learning and growing experience.

“I learned so much last year,” she said. “I learned so much about the game, and about coaching. I learned so much from coach Mouat. After going through that last year, I would love to coach some day, and I owe that to all I learned from coach Mouat last year.

“I just wanted to try and help the team in any way I could,” she added. “And he (Mouat) was awesome through it all. He really trusted me and would ask me what I thought during games. That really meant a lot to me, and I will always appreciate that. So it turned out to be a great experience for me. I think I’m a better player because of it too. I just learned so much.”

Never Giving Up

As much as Bennett learned about coaching and the game last season, she was ultimately sitting out in order to have the chance to play one more year as a Skylight. Coming back stronger than ever was always the goal, and leaving on her terms, as a player, instead of letting an injury dictate the end was something Bennett wanted more than anything.

And for a time this season, that’s exactly how her senior season was unfolding — that is, until the injury happened all over again.

From that moment on, Bennett was faced with a brutal truth — either have surgery and her career would be over, or, fight back, and go through all of it all over again. Rehab as much as possible and get back on the floor before the season ends was the decision. Playing on a torn knee isn’t easy and it will be painful, but in Bennett’s mind, the choice was clear, and Mouat knows why.

“She’s very head strong,” Mouat said. “She’s very committed to the game, and to this program. I really admire her for that. I admire her toughness and her grit. Once would have been enough for a lot of players, but she fights to come back again. It’s just very inspiring. She’s so inspiring.”

“I thought I was stubborn before,” Bennett said. “But now, with all I’ve gone though, I’m way more stubborn and determined than I ever have been. I’m also very lucky. I have such great support from everybody. My family, I have always had great teammates who have always supported and believed in me, and of course, coach Mouat. He’s been so amazing. So it’s for all of them that I wanted to work hard for, to come back and play for.”

Her comebacks, not once, but now twice have inspired her teammates too. And while she says they’re the reason she continues to fight for her career to not be over, they say, she’s the reason they are who they are too.

“Rachelle is the kind of leader and teammate that one could only hope to have,” said Skylight sophomores Brandy Lambourne and Jacy Thompson. “She's been a great coach, teammate and most of all, a friend to every single one of us. I think it's safe to say that all of us admire and envy her perseverance to overcome challenges on and off the court.”

And come back Bennett hopefully has. She’ll be in uniform, and is cleared to play for the rest of the season — a season she thinks will keep going, much like it did a year ago. And that’s a big reason why she knew, even in the instant she damaged her surgically repaired knee again, that she was going to play more basketball before her career was done. She knew, because of the team and coach she plays for, and with, that she was going to finish this season, and her outstanding Northern career, on her terms.

“I’ve had a good feeling all year that we could do special things again this season,” Bennett said. “I knew this team could get back there again (national tournament). To go back there three years in a row would be a really special thing, and that’s one of the reasons I wasn’t going to quit. And to get back and be able to finish the season with my teammates, that got me rehabbing and working really hard.”

Of course, working hard, whether it is to be the best basketball player she can be, or because she was backed into a difficult corner by not one, but two devastating knee injuries, is nothing new to Bennett. Working hard — a work ethic she’s always had growing up in rural Montana — is what she does, what she’s always done. And that hard work and dedication she put into the game, that love for the game, for her teammates, for her coach, for the Skylights, and MSU-Northern is also why, no matter how hard things have been, no matter how rough things seem to be, she won’t quit. It’s why she can’t quit. It’s just who she is.

“She’s an amazing person,” Mouat said. “Yes, she’s a great basketball player, when she’s at full strength, she’s one of the best defensive players I’ve ever had. She’s a great athlete, a great student, all of that across the board. But she is just an amazing person all around. She’s been an incredible part of this program, and we’re very lucky Rachelle chose to be a Skylight.”

For all of those reasons, and all she’s went through to remain a Skylight, are why Bennett knew, the moment it happened against Carroll, the moment her knee went out on her again, she wasn’t giving up. She was never going to give up. And on top of it all, she wasn’t just going to keep fighting, she was going to make a positive out of a bigt-ime setback — and once again, inspire all around her. That’s just what Rachelle Bennett does.

“I think a lot of positives have come out of all of this,” she said. “I’ve come out of it all a much more mentally strong person, not just as a basketball player, but as a person. When you go through something like this, you learn to push yourself beyond your limits. You learn to overcome all of your frustrations. It’s like, after the first time, I know I did all I could to get healthy again, and play again, and yet, it happened again. But that didn’t mean I had to give up. Deep down I knew I just couldn’t give up.

“Experiences like this just teach you so much about yourself and about life,” she continued. “And I’ve learned so much through all of this. I just think it shows you that you don’t have to give up on what you love to do, no matter what happens. And I just want to be able to say I gave it everything. I don’t want to look back one day and wonder whether I did or not. I know, when this is over, I’ll be able to say I gave it everything I had, and I’m proud of that.”

There’s no wondering Rachelle. You’ve done that and then some. And along the way, you’ve inspired so many doing what you do — and that’s to not quit, to not give up. You’ve showed us all what it means to fight for what you want, and that is a lesson that will last a lifetime.