Pamville News: Deterring crime 101

In an era when untold amounts of tax dollars are spent on steering kids away from a life of crime — both before and after the criminal behavior has begun — through education programs and activities or young kids, teens and parents, Nebraska police recently dropped the ball during what Pamville editors believe could have been an educational experience for one of its youngest delinquents and his mother.

Nebraska TV news website WOWT.com reported April 15 that a 3-year-old boy, reported missing by his mother from their Lincoln, Nebraska, apartment, was found across the street at a bowling alley, where he had crawled inside — yes, inside — a coin-operated claw machine and was playing with the stuffed animals.

At the same time the mother, 24, was reporting to 911 the child had gone missing while she was using the bathroom, Madsen's Bowling and Billiards staff was reporting a child found and calling the vendor to get the child freed from the glass case of the claw machine.

En route to the scene, WOWT said, the officers put 2-and-2 together and reunited mother and child with the help of the vendor who unlocked the machine and gave the child a toy.

Officers did not cite the mother, determining that her prompt action in calling 911 once she discovered her son was missing showed no negligence on her part.

And everybody lived happily ever after. … Not.

This kind of dereliction of duty would not be tolerated in Pamville, I can tell you that much.

This incident has just set the stage for creating a future juvenile repeat offender and a no-account, slacker mother. The system will waste tens of thousands, if not hundreds of thousands, of tax dollars on this pair.

Had this type of insidious crime happened in Pamville, I would encourage law enforcement officers and the judge to act swiftly, decisively and without mamby pandering to young women and little humans who make themselves out to be innocent victims.

First of all, someone needs to teach that mom that when she goes to the bathroom she should have that child secured to the premises. Don't bother locking the front door, those mini-humans are masterminds at figuring out how to bypass security systems. Securing the child itself is the only sure bet. That's what they make duct tape for, just tape him firmly to the wall and do your doody in peace like any decent parent would do, including mine.

Second of all, that child should've gotten misdemeanor citations for running away from home, breaking and entering and vandalism, and possibly being out past toddler curfew and jay walking.

He should be serving hard time inside the glass case of the claw machine.

Not only that but the pair could've been taught a lesson by leaving the tyke incarcerated in that glass cell until his mother paid his hefty fine: one quarter at a time until she figured out how to nab her child with the claw and drop him into the out chute.

Any toys he drug out with him would be confiscated and used as evidence in his theft trial.

That's how we scare ’em straight in Pamville.

(Duct tape: not just for ducts any more at [email protected].)