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“You almost got fired because your company had a holiday party? You’re going to have to explain.” “Look, where I come from, we call holiday parties ‘Christmas parties.’ Nobody told me I was supposed to avoid anything relating to our country’s Christmas tradition.” “What did you do?” “Well, the owners of my company threw our holiday party after work one evening. Thanks to me and the boys in the sales department, the adult beverages were flowing. That’s when the Human Resources director threatened to can me.” “You were unaw...
Barack Obama had just beaten John McCain by a margin of 10 million votes and 7.2 percentage points — the biggest Democratic win since 1964. Democrats also won both congressional chambers. And yet, despite this decisive pro-Democratic mandate to govern, congressional Republicans resolved, at a private dinner on day one, not to offer a scintilla of cooperation. They resolved to thwart Obama’s efforts to fix the Great Recession, hoping that his failures would grease a Republican comeback in the 2012 race. Newt Gingrich, a din...
Larry Jefferson, a black man, played Santa Claus at the Mall of America in Minnesota for four days last week. Naturally, racists on the internet lost their minds over it. “I clicked on the story fully expecting that they picked a Somali to play Santa. That would be fitting for Minnesota,” someone named Victor Edwards, surely destined for a lump of coal in his stocking, wrote in the comments to a story posted by a CBS station in Minnesota. “Have a radical muslim who hates America and the western world play Santa. Give him a...
There is almost nothing real about “reality TV.” All but the dullest viewers understand that the dramatic twists and turns on shows like “Bachelor” or “Celebrity Apprentice” are scripted in advance. More or less like professional wrestling, Donald Trump’s previous claim to fame. Welcome to the reality TV presidency. Nothing president-elect Trump says is to be taken literally, nor evaluated for its truth content. His surrogates have made that clear. Once and future sidekick Corey Lewandowski recently admonished journalists at...
How do we know Dr. Ben Carson is unqualified to be Secretary of Housing and Urban Development? Because House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi said so, calling him “disturbingly unqualified.” “There is no evidence that Dr. Carson brings the necessary credentials to hold a position with such immense responsibilities and impact on families and communities across America,” Pelosi said. She supported President Obama’s nominee, Julian Castro, whose “necessary” experience in the housing industry was limited to being mayor of San Antoni...
In some ways, 2016 will go down as a landmark year for grizzly bear management. The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service announced its proposal to delist grizzly bears in the Greater Yellowstone Area — or GYA — after a federal court rejected a 2007 delisting rule. The grizzly population in the Greater Yellowstone Area reached its recovery goals prior to 2007 and the population continues to exceed all recovery benchmarks, as outlined by the Endangered Species Act and FWS. Recovery of grizzlies in the GYA is one of the greatest con...
I am 8 years old. Some of my friends say there IS a Santa Claus. Papa says, “If you see it in the Communist Party paper Granma, it’s so.” Please tell me the truth, El Presidente. Is there a Santa Claus? — Virginia O’Hanlon Dear Virginia: Your little friends are wrong. Of course there is no Santa Claus. Did your papa not tell you that I banned all likenesses of Santa, a symbol of Yankee capitalist greed, in 1959? Did your papa not read the 1959 Time article that explained how I required all Christmas decorations to be made o...
I would first like to wish everyone a very Happy Holiday Season from the Havre Area Chamber of Commerce Board of Directors and the Chamber staff. During this time of year, many people give unselfishly of their time to make the holidays a little more special for all of us. And we are very grateful to their efforts and time. Sometimes “thank you” just doesn’t seem to be a strong enough expression of one’s gratefulness. As I proceed, you will soon see what I mean. It takes many people willing to give unselfishly of their t...
During a brief stint working in public health, part of my regular tasks was to write Public Service Announcements, or PSAs, on topics related to health matters. And when I say “writing PSAs about health matters,” I mean “learning things about illnesses and the human body that have scarred me for life.” No one likes getting a cold or flu. I get that. We can build up a certain amount of resistance to the viruses by surviving illnesses as children and by being healthy in general, but we really can’t become immune to them. It...
My new car has all of those fancy extras designed to keep me from killing someone while driving. It has a thing that beeps when someone’s in my blind spot; it has a back-up camera that will beep and hit the brakes if I’m about to back into something. When it’s in cruise control, it will automatically slow down if the car in front of me is going slower than I am. I still have to yell at that driver and give him a hand gesture when I pass him, but someday, cars will do that automatically, too. Let’s face it: This car practic...
I’ll bet you a can of Who Hash that you didn’t realize the classic holiday special “Dr. Seuss’ How The Grinch Stole Christmas” — based on the 1957 book — celebrates its 50th anniversary Dec. 18. Federal regulations require that I give the full, formal title of the program, so you don’t confuse it with “William Faulkner’s How The Grinch Stole Christmas” or “Aristotle’s How The Grinch Stole Christmas.” According to Wikipedia, the holiday perennial almost didn’t get made. The author didn’t want any of his books animated. Lege...
Franklin Roosevelt once said, “Democracy cannot succeed unless those who express their choice are prepared to choose wisely.” He was talking about why education matters in a representative democracy, but it’s a safe bet that had he known about fake internet news, he’d have said the same thing — except maybe with more pointed words. Our representative democracy depends on ordinary people making sound judgments about politicians and policy. This is hard to do at the best of times. Issues are complex. Being able to sort out...
I support tree love I stole the title from someone else who, in turn, had stolen the phrase from a T-shirt. The sentiment fits. I like trees. Leo, the man who helps me with my gardening, might raise his eyebrow. I had him obliterate trees and bushes left and right over the past few months. In my defense, I know the importance of negative space in creating an artistic view and I planted new and different greenery of all kinds with the intent of keeping it under moderate control. Together, we have created a park of art. And, I...
In one of the more bizarre twists in this incredibly bizarre year, Donald Trump now questions the legitimacy of ballots cast in an election that he won. Faced with a recount in Michigan that he opposes, but that is almost certain to confirm his victory, Trump has once again taken to Twitter to rail about a “rigged” system — though apparently it’s rigged only in the states he lost. What he really seems to be responding to is the fact that, though he is the president-elect, Hillary Clinton bested him by more than 2 million...
Now that Republicans will be running the White House, the House and the Senate, they’d better succeed in streamlining and simplifying our bloated government. Quotes from some of our greatest minds can guide them. While President Obama sought to make government cool again, many great minds have long been wary of government: “Government’s view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it.” — Ronald Reagan “A government...
Family caregivers are an invaluable part of our state. More than 118,000 family caregivers provide about $1.4 billion in unpaid care. Their commitment allows loved ones to stay at home, with their families in their own communities as they age. As the state director for AARP here in Montana, I believe that we owe a huge debt of gratitude to this silent army of family caregivers who quietly go about taking care of their loved ones. That is why AARP is strongly supportive of the Montana Caregiver Act bill, sponsored by Rep. Gera...
The single issue that Donald Trump used most effectively to win the national election was immigration. For decades, Democrats have entirely failed to understand how many citizens feel about illegal immigration, offering almost no serious plan to secure our border and instead irresponsibly suggesting that open borders and a welfare state are a fiscally responsible policy. Now don’t get me wrong — I absolutely do not agree with everything Trump has said on the issue of immigration. But the honest reality is that he has tap...
More than a half-century ago, in the dark November days after the Kennedy assassination, White House officials set the date for members of Lyndon B. Johnson’s family to move from their home in Washington’s Spring Valley into the executive mansion: Dec. 7, 1963. Lady Bird Johnson was aghast. “I wished it could have been the 6th or the 8th or the 9th,” she told me almost 16 years ago. She thought that moving into the White House on Dec. 7 was, as she put it in that long-ago conversation, “a day of ill omen.” Hardly anyone aliv...
It’s an unfortunate reality of our current political system that problems usually don’t get fixed until they near crisis proportions. And that’s what we’re approaching with our badly broken immigration system: a crisis. Our border security is failing. Our legal immigration system is not optimized to allow in immigrants who want to build businesses, create jobs, or fill high-skill positions. And we have nearly 11 million undocumented immigrants living here illegally. No more kicking the can down the road. It’s time to addres...
President-elect Donald Trump told a Cincinnati audience this week that he intends to make some big changes in U.S. foreign policy. During his “thank you” tour in the midwest, Trump had this to say: “We will pursue a new foreign policy that finally learns from the mistakes of the past. We will stop looking to topple regimes and overthrow governments. … In our dealings with other countries we will seek shared interests wherever possible ... .” If this is really to be President Trump’s foreign policy, it would be a welcome chang...
Too often, health care gets wrapped up in political debate while forgetting the actual needs of people. The reality is that there are people hurting and they deserve help. My family and I know this all too well. Just over a month ago, my mother-in-law passed away after a long battle with Alzheimer’s. Consuelo was an amazing, brilliant woman. She was appointed by President Eisenhower as Honorary Council to Peru, she was one of the most kind, hospitable people I’ve ever known and she raised an amazing daughter who embodies all...
If I were in school in these modern scientific times, I would be labeled with some kind of official diagnosis rather than just the quaint terms “shy” and “awkward.” Someone with skills would teach me how to be a real kid. I learned the hard way, like the way Dad taught me to swim. I learned to dog paddle, then he tossed me off the end of the dock in a trial by water to make my way to shore. Apparently I could add “scrappy” to my list descriptives. If you saw a movie character modeled after junior-high me, you would think...
Amid the climate of disbelief and fear among Democrats following Donald Trump’s election, a fascinating debate has broken out about what’s called “identity politics” on the left, “political correctness” by the right. And about time, I say. The kind of race- and gender-based moral bullying prevalent on many college campuses and in certain media outlets has been extremely damaging to the Democratic Party. My only fear is that the argument will be too polite. Sometimes, people just need to get smacked right between the eyes. A...
There is just no pleasing some people. And by “some people,” I mean my family. My brothers and sisters showed up this weekend to help me get a few little projects done around the house. While they sawed, sanded, scraped and painted, I cooked. Their compliments of my cooking ranged from “That wasn’t too disgusting” to “At least he’s trying.” High praise indeed, if you had heard what they said the last time I cooked for them. This time, I found some canned peaches Sue had put up; I stretched my abilities and made a pie for...
Editor: A quote from the book “The Way of the Heart,” by Raymund Andrea. “Open your morning paper and note the trend of things for a day, and what do you find? The everlasting wrangling of politicians, those clever saviors of the world; the undisciplined tempers and ravings of men of high estate, only high financially; and those of low estate — the mob. From a cultural point of view, both are a reproach and a warning; from a spiritual point of view, they are a menace.” Frank Mclain Havre...